Poor performance...

Well the recent swim meet this past weekend was not my best performance by any stretch of the imagination. I actually felt quite disappointed (and still do). I guess I just don't have it anymore which is too bad because I didn't think I was washed up just yet. Also, I was still fighting a cold at this meet and that zapped my energy a bit. That could have made a difference I'm sure. Don't get me wrong, I'm not going to stop swimming by any stretch of the imagination. Although, I'm debating in my mind as to how much I actually will compete in the future. I definitely know that I won't be going to the Nanaimo meet. I think I need some time to assess where I am at and think about what competitions I want to go to in the future. I definitely will be going to at least one or two more this year maybe more depending but I don't think I want to go to Nanaimo at this time.

I know I've been through a lot in my life and I have my own issues that I'm trying to work out maybe I shouldn't be so hard on myself on why I'm not swimming well. After all, in many ways, I don't even feel like the same person that I was when I was 16. I look at things I've done in the past.. I look at old ribbons and medals that I won.. I look at academic reports that I've written in high school and university and I think, it's not me who could have done that. It sounds weird to someone else who is reading this that I could think this way. But it's true, I actually think sometimes that I'm not the same person as I was when I was younger. My life has changed so much from then to now that I might as well be a different person. I've changed completely beyond recognition.

In any case, I'll keep up my regimen of training and working out and hopefully in the long run, I can see some results of at least staying healthy and losing weight if not improving my swimming times also.